Buddhist in Training

Just so you all know, I am leaving for a cruise tomorrow and will be missing for the next few days. I probably won’t post much but will get back to it! :) Hopefully I’ll be able to post some pictures while I’m in Key West and Mexico but if not I will share the love later. ;) Hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Namaste

It’s been a long day guys. I am completely lost. I am not sure where I will be in a month. I have no idea where I will be in six months, a year, or five years. I have no idea where I want to finish school or what I want to study. I have no idea if I want to stay in Virginia or go back to Colorado. I have no idea if I want to be either place.

But you know what? I’m embracing it. I am embracing the unpleasant feeling of not knowing a damn thing.

I will never solve these puzzles by constantly thinking and stressing about them. I am in the process of reading a book that talks about how we must explore the emptiness within us in order to stop fearing it. It is the same with this, I have to stop being scared of these decisions and about which is the ‘right’ one to make. I am embracing my indecisiveness because that is the only way I will ever reach a conclusion.

Peace is available in the chaos of life; the two are not separate. In order to escape suffering you must experience it.

I am going to meditate every single day in these nagging thoughts and uncomfortable emotions because that is the only way through them.

Sometimes I get lost in this life.
I haven’t found it yet-
True happiness and security.
But maybe all life is..
Fleeting emotions and moments of bliss intertwined with inevitable suffering.
In the end, when the day is done
All you really have is yourself.

The only solid constant action in this world is that each moment leaves us
We will end up alone
I just hope that being alone does not necessitate loneliness
It might. Probably does for most.

That is life
But I strive to find more.
I will make more.
My heart will make something more- I will find the strength
To pour my love into the world

This is what I’m living for..
Love.

So this is one of two notes I just found which I wrote my senior year in high school (about 3 years ago) and I just want to post because I found them helpful tonight. I also found it amazing that my thinking was so clear and similar to the path I find myself on now. At the time I wrote these I was not learning about or practicing Buddhism but there are a lot of things that are very similar to beliefs I have come across. Anyway, the writing is personal but I hope you can relate and maybe enjoy it a bit too. Oh and on another note, this was not the easiest point in my life and like a lot of seniors- a time of immense change.

Chasing dreams that have yet to come, Drowning in the memory of what has been

Always hoping for more but begging for the way it was

Why can’t I stop, why can’t we stop?

And put all our energy into what is

Instead of what will or has

Everything is complicated- content seems like an impossible feeling in any situation

But maybe we need to focus less on what is external- The judgements from others

Negative and insignificant

We need to learn how to be more pleasing internally

More pleasing to ourselves

Turn our focus on what makes a difference to well-being

Ask ourselves what makes us feel whole and go from there

Because life should not be wasted trying to please others when we are left in pieces

Every part of our body and mind

Every person who has been a part of your life has left their unique mark

Each should make you stronger- more wholesome

Every memory- lost or gained, past and present, felt and imagined

Nothing taken for granted

Interpreted to stimulate growth. Grow whole.

Concern yourself only with what impacts you in a way that completes your person

Uneasiness comes from feeling disconnected- like pieces are lost

So be whole, choose to see your whole life.

Live whole, do what makes you whole

And love those who make your life whole

Nothing is only good or bad.

Everything is something, each step has a purpose

Choose to see all there is because one option is simply not enough

Not whole

Skyping with my little brother, he is such a dork & I miss him so much!! We are best friends :)

Poor quality because I was on my phone but whatever :P

Just getting started but it will be… buddhist-in-training.blogspot.com

I promised to write about celebrating my first Buddhist holiday, Lhabab Duchen and am just now getting around to it. Sorry! I’m sure you all don’t really mind but I hope you are interested in hearing about this because it was an incredible experience.

This celebration or more appropriately, puja* was my first participation in a Buddhist holiday. I celebrated with a group of people gathered in a cozy room above a Japanese restaurant and Tibetan store in Old Town Alexandria. The teacher leading the ceremony was Khenchen Tsewang Gyatso Rinpoche* a cheerful and warm man with a rhythmic tone to his voice that makes it easy to slip into a meditative state during chants. I heard about this gathering through my weekly meditation group which I attend every Sunday in the same space. The leaders of the group, Keith and Geoff were in attendance along with a couple other familiar faces but out of about the 15-20 people there, I did not know most of them.

Both Keith and Geoff are students of Khenchen and have been practicing Buddhism for several years. I have spoken to Keith many times after group meditation and he was again helpful at the puja. We spoke for a few minutes about what we were celebrating, what would happen, and the rest of Khenchen’s schedule during his visit. As we waited to start I also socialized with the people around me and got comfortable in a seat with the binder and pamphlets set out for everyone in attendance. The room we were gathered in is not very big but several cushions and chairs were laid out facing the alter and podium. To the right of the seating arrangements was a table with every inch covered in bowls of food. There were dorritos, crackers, dried fruit, clementines, a roasted chicken! I was amazed and wondered for a second if I would be able to concentrate with all the food nearby (it turned out to not be an issue).

After 10 or 15 minutes of waiting and people rushing in to find seats, it began. We all stood as Khenchen entered the room following a woman carrying lit incense gracefully swirling it in front of her as she walked. Everyone placed their hands in front of their chest with their hands forming the Namaskara Mudra* and bowed in respect as Khenchen walked past. Once he was at the front of the room he began to perform three prostrations* then a soon as he was finished everyone else followed suit, except of course, me (an my boyfriend who attended). It was awkward for a second but then I realized no one was there to judge me and they probably didn’t care. I wanted to be respectful and look like I knew what I was doing but I think it was too late for that. I was aware of what prostrations were but admittedly had never done one and even if I wanted to, I just had hip surgery so I don’t think it would have been possible. I wish I knew that it was a part of the ritual and perhaps an alternative for someone unable to fully participate but it was too late for that as well so I bowed my head for a few moments and had a seat.

Almost immediately we began chanting with Khenchen’s apprentices instructing which page of which pamphlet we should flip to. I was confused and amazed yet again. All of the chants are of course written in Tibetan and thankfully there was a phonetical translation underneath for me (and probably everyone else) to follow along. However, this definitely did not make it easy. I guessed at pronunciation most of the time and there was more than one occasion when I lost my place and had to look at my neighbors for what page we were on. There were also moments when we were to repeat mantras and although the first time went well and I repeated with little difficulty, the second time I had no idea what mantra everyone was reading and repeating because they were speaking so quickly! It wasn’t too bad though because I decided to just fall back on the one I know well, Om Mani Padme Hum, I figured it was better than nothing.

At one point during the chants Geoff walked around the group giving a small amount of wine or juice to each person. At first I had no idea what was happening so I observed intently. Each person was given about a teaspoon of liquid into their palm which they scooped into their mouths, after doing so they brushed their hand over the top of their head. I was not at all familiar with what we were doing but I copied what I saw. I still am trying to figure out what the ritual was and I can’t help but compare it to the Christian communion during church. It was similar but I am still researching to find the purpose in Buddhist practice. I may just ask Keith on Sunday.

The chanting continued for I guess almost 2 hours but it did not feel anywhere close to that long. My concentration stuck on the page (and yes sometimes the anxiety of not knowing what I was doing) and the rhytmic sounds of the chants so eloquently recited by Khenchen and many of the participants. I enjoyed it very much and on several occasions slipped into a meditative state while following along. It was nice and I felt very glad that I was able to participate.

As we reached the ending of the chants, several volunteers began passing out the food. Every dish that was presented was shared as the volunteers first gave out plates an napkins then proceeded to give food. Everyone got a fair share and by the end our plates were piled high with yummy treats. It was a light-hearted activity full of smiles and laughter as pieces fell off the overfilled plates and onto the floor. There was also a great sense of community derived from this mass sharing with people I had never even met before. It was very enjoyable and once the chants finished, we began to eat and Khenchen quietly exited the room as gracious “thank yous” whispered behind him. We all continued to eat and bags were passed out to take home any leftovers. I chatted with the people around me and enjoyed their company before taking off with many others after about 20-30 minutes.

This was a great experience and I am so glad I have participated in my first Buddhist celebration!! Let me know if you all have any questions and I hope this wasn’t too long. :)

Puja: The name given to a wide variety of devotional and offering ceremonies practiced in all Buddhist traditions.

Khenchen Tsewang Gyatso Rinpoche: Khen Rinpoche is one of the three senior-most Khenchens from Palyul Namdroling Moanstery in South India. He speaks fluent English and travels worldwide yearly to offer teachings to students interested in Buddhism. (he’s on Facebook!)

Namaskara Mudra: Gesture of greeting, prayer, and adoration. Buddhas no longer make this gesture because they do not have to show devotion to anything. (also what you use in yoga forming ‘prayer hands’ or when you say Namaste)

Prostrations: a gesture used in Buddhist practice to show reverence to the Triple Gem (comprising the Buddha, his teachings, and the spiritual community) and other objects of veneration. Watch this if interested in how to do prostrations —-> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LI4xHU44P3o&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Lhabab Duchen: One of the four Buddhist festivals commemorating four events in the life of the Buddha, according to Tibetan traditions. Lhabab Düchen occurs on the 22nd day of the ninth month on a Tibetan calendar. This is a Buddhist festival celebrated to observe the descent of Buddha from heaven back to earth. Buddha had left for heaven at the age of 41, having ascended to The Heaven of Thirty-Three (Trayastrimsa) in order to give teachings to benefit the gods in the desire realms and to repay the kindness of his mother by liberating her from Samsara. He was exhorted by his follower and representative Maugalyayana to return, and after a long debate managed to return. This is considered to be one of the eight great deeds of the Buddha. He returned to earth by a special triple ladder prepared by Viswakarma, the god of machines. On Lhabab Duchen, the effects of positive or negative actions are multiplied ten million times. It is part of Tibetan Buddhist tradition to engage in virtuous activities and prayer on this day.

(Source: buddhistintraining)

culturedwind:

Hello world of Tumblr! I’ve been quite inspired lately to communicate postally. Its so exciting to get things in the mail… Things you can hold on to and enjoy. It occurred to me that there is no better of a place than Tumblr to find a creative and insightful pen pal. Would anyone be interested in receiving mail from me and returning some too? I think it would be ridiculously fun. Depending on how many people are into this we could even set up a cool chain letter or something. Pass this along and/or message me if you’re interested :)

This would be so cool

(Source: probation)